The Power of Listening

This summer, I have been able to spend a lot of time with my 8 year old niece. I've really been trying to be "in the moment" and seeing the world as she does. It has made for a fabulous summer of crafting, creativity, and imagination.

The most important thing in her day is being heard. She doesn't always respond to things the way I'd like--testing out being sassy or having her own opinion. For example, she believes that the outdoor pool where she does her swimming lessons is heated on cold days and cooled on hot days. There is no convincing her of relative temperature. However, I know she hears me when I say things like, "Your brain blocks you if you think you can't do something. When you say positive things, your brain helps you learn new things." or "I think some of the kids aren't listening and offering too many suggestions, which limit your swimming time." In both cases, I watched her challenge herself. She approached diving with an open mind and, after one goofy mistake-laden flop, she dives beautifully. In the other, I witnessed her not sharing comments and listening more. So, kids really do hear what you say.

I know she knows I'll listen to her. I've heard stories of being bullied and teased, drama with friends, and her plans for the future. It's fascinating to see the world from her perspective.

Often, those times I think she's talking back, she's really just expressing an idea or opinion with a good reason behind it. I hope this lesson I've learned this summer translates to the next school year.